86 Responses

  1. Tracy at |

    Where to start. I am an American. I lived in Germany for a few years with my family, my dad was in the Army. This is a true love story that still lingers to this day. I was 17 when I met him, this was back in 1985. My best friend Gigi and I were out one Saturday doing our usual “Girls just wanna have fun” shopping days. We were buying new outfits to wear that night to the club. We took a lunch break at Mc D’s, and that’s when I saw him. I started kicking Gigi under the table to look at that drop dead gorgeous guy. He was kind of short, black thick hair and eyebrows, big round dark eyes and darker skin and wearing a Mickey Mouse lifting a barbell tank top and jeans. He resembled Prince except for the clothes. Little did I know he had already seen me and after placing his order he made his way over to our table, that’s when Gigi was kicking me because she was facing his direction and watching him approach. He spoke in German not knowing I was American, but quickly changed to English. It was instant attraction. That’s where our story began. We dated for a year and he bought me a ring when he went to Turkey on vacation with his family. He introduced me to his parents shortly after we started dating and they tolerated our relationship as did my parents. His youngest sister was such a sweetheart, being about 8 when I met her. I only mention her because I profoundly changed her life and am so proud of her accomplishments and she taught me how to belly dance.
    Neither of our parents wanted us together because of our religion and race. We just wanted to be together…forever, that’s all. We were both 18 now and my dads tour was ending. That meant I had to go back to Texas. We didn’t break it off though. We wrote lots of letters back and forth and ran up a phone bill. I had to wait for three months to get a visa approved and a non military passport. In the meantime I worked three different jobs to try to make the time go by faster. Before I left, he made me promise to come back to marry him. I used alot of that money I made to buy a beautiful wedding gown and had it fitted and sent to Germany to his family home. The time finally came and against my parents wishes I got on a plane for Germany. Against his parents wishes, he picked me up from the airport and moved me into his bedroom. Crap hit the fan, but because he was the first son he got his way. His parents gave us their bedroom, it was very awkward. After a few weeks and his parents realizing I wasn’t leaving, they decided to make life very difficult for both he and I. Eventually his father said I had to move out because people in the building were talking badly about them letting an American girl live there and for not having more control over their son. I think when the wedding dress arrived is when they were really worried.
    I ended up getting in touch with a friend of mine who was in the Army. She lived off base and was going through a divorce. Her two young kids needed to be taken care of when they weren’t in school, so moving me in as her nanny worked out great for the the time being. Olcay’s father forbid him from seeing me, but that wasn’t going to happen. He just had his friends lie to his parents for him to cover where he was. This really restricted us though. Eventually his father found out somehow and threatened to disown him. That’s serious talk for that culture. We had to break up. I was devastated and fell into a deep depression and crying frenzy. The gal I lived with called Olcay and told him he had to come see me. He had shown up in time because I had taken alot of pills. I couldn’t live without him. We were 19 at this point. Our birthdays were only 7 days apart, mine being the first, June 5th.
    Our story does not end here, but I need to rest my brain. This is still just like yesterday to me..we will be 50 this year. I will finish this story if any of you girls are interested. There is a lesson to be learned here.

    Reply
    1. Ilayda at |

      I would love to know the rest.

      Reply
    2. MelissaJ at |

      Want to hear the story!!!

      Reply
  2. kadirbl at |

    Im turkish men !!

    Reply
    1. Lira at |

      Hello !
      I’m currently dating a Türk for 9 months now , we met on some social app it was just a whimsical decision at first but then we decided to take it seriously.
      I would like to know more details on the matter of a Christian dating a Muslim since my father is a Priest and he obviously would not like the thought of me being converted to another religion , so is it REALLY necessary for me to be converted if i were to marry him ?
      thanks 🙂

      Reply
      1. Kay at |

        Don’t quote me I am not a scholar. However, it’s my understanding that Muslim men may marry outside of their faith to women if the book aka Christian and Jewish women. I think one of the challenges that you will face would be if his family similar to yours perhaps wants him to marry within the faith. Hope that helps!

        #AMuslimAmerican

        Reply
        1. Lira at |

          Sadly, yes indeed if by any chance , my father said i should encourage him to be converted as a Christian but i can see that it’s nearly impossible for me to do it ,as to his family they also would like it better if i were a türk and a muslim.

          Reply
      2. Lee at |

        Watch your backs ladies …there are three things you can expect from Turks …to be conned, to get a disease and to be lied to o. I spent 25 years in a that community. .they have the nerve to call American and British women whores ..these guys are gigolo pigs and Love Rats! ….Watch Out!!! …Green Cards, Money and getting laid is their ONLY interest !! And before anyone calls me racist or sterotyping…I know what I talking about, almost every male in my ex’s home town came to America, lieing, using and abusing women for a Green Card when they have wives and children in Turkey, just to name a couple nasty things the y do. Watch your backs, they are lying , user , whores, don’t say you weren’t warned!!

        Reply
      3. Caring Angel at |

        Nooo, don’t do it. You don’t have to convert for anything or him. He has to accept you as a Christian, that is, if he loves and cares for you, he will accept you as you ARE WITH YOUR RELIGION ALWAYS

        Reply
    2. KRIZZIA at |

      Hello! Im krizzia
      And im engaged to a turkish man whom i beleieved who loved me with all his being ! And now this day in few hours he will arrive but i am totally worried if its all about flights thats why i kept myself busy reading about this article but anyways his the one who supports me coz he believed that a man should support his future wife and how surprisingly for 5months long distance relationship and im just his girlfriend and fiance and future wife haha but anyways he is very intelligent man ive ever known i never thought of all the type of man that im looking for, i would never expect that i will fall in love wit my boyfriend and now my future husband soon his too rush for marriage and wanted me to live in turkey but he still wants me to decide if i want to live somewhere else! I MUST SAY!! TRUKISH MAN ARE VERY HARDWORKING MEN WHEN IT COMES FOR FAMILY BUT IF YOU BREAK THEIR TRUST THEY WOULD NOT BE AS THE MAN YOU LOVED FOR SURE BUT I GUESS ALL MEN AND WOMEN DOES THAT ! i am certainly happy right now!!

      ***I just have questions if turkish men can be like other muslims that can have multiple wives???**

      Coz if that will do i dont know if i would be able to think normally if im not the only one wife of his life that could kill me

      Reply
  3. Denise at |

    I’m dating my boyfriend for almost 7 months he is Turkish. And take note he is so charming, lovely and very caring guy. He never let me feel alone or sad. He is always supporting and a very good guy to me, to my family and to my friends. He never let me pay bills and he is very generous. I can never say something against them, because he let me meet his friends and his family. Hopefully this coming 2017 I’ll go with him to visit Turkey. I’ve never been this happy through my past relationship. So girls we cannot judge them generally. It will really depend on the person if they’re sincere to you or willing to go beyond their comfortzone to meet yours. GoodLuck on searching your Dear one. Görü?ürüz

    Reply
    1. She at |

      Your lucky Denise that you meet someone like him,,,,???
      I always adored people who found the love of their life.
      As for me,i have a boyfriend.he’s Turkish….I mean ex-boyfriend,coz we broke-up.but we still talk to each other.we broke up because first,hi’s family dont want me because im a Christian and He’s a Muslim.and the other thing is were to far from each other,he’s in Turkey and im here in the Philippines.but i really Love him so much,and so he did.
      Is changing my religion can help us?

      Reply
      1. Sara at |

        Hello, She. I’m a Filipina and my husband is also Turkish. From my experience, Turkish Muslims have a strong hold on their religion and yes, you may have to convert to Islam in order for you to be with him. Also, they value the opinions and advice of their families more than anyone else. I was once a Christian too like you. So far, my husband’s family and relatives have been very hospitable and they welcomed me warmly when I went to visit their country. My husband is a very caring man and I would say I am lucky to have him in my life.

        Reply
  4. Lorraine at |

    I met someone from turkey through social media! I went to see him and he was charming but never has any money so I was expected to support him while I was there ! I didn’t mind meals but he moaned about his rent not being paid and having a crap phone ! That’s when I realised he literally seen me as a meal ticket .. We argued then he used to disappear of a night time ! I stayed at his apartment while on holiday and I was left alone most of the time ! I had my suspicions that maybe he had a wife or was even seeing someone else while I was there ! This disappearing trick done my head in so I packed my stuff and stayed at a hotel.. I got all of 5 mins to say goodbye to him because yet again he was elsewhere ! He broke my heart but I’m glad I saw the real person now.

    Reply
    1. Yusuf at |

      It’s sad that he did that you, remember not all Turkish men are like that, you should not date a Turkish men from touristic cities, more in the normal cities, those men are more like conservative and don’t treat women like a dirt.
      I’m Turkish myself and I have a Japanese wife, I met her when she was touring in my country…
      She fell in love with me, so did I, but I’m very different from what here is described, I didn’t flirt, I just talked, according to her I was fun, serious and charming.
      But I never pestered her about becoming my lover, My intention was more to create foreign friends.
      But in the end we both fell in love.
      My advice and tip, don’t find love in big cities, try to find love in a normal cities.

      Reply
      1. Azreena Nor Azman at |

        Salam yusuf, which part of Turkey that you mean ‘normal cities’. Mind to give some enlightenment? Thanks a lot and I am very happy that you and your wife is so in love with each other ??

        Reply
  5. Connie at |

    Well as for me, I met a guy few months ago through a social site. Everything went smooth sailing till we eventually met in person. He was so sweet, kind, caring and everything that could possibly make you head over heels for. After him going back to turkey, only did i know that he still talks to his ex. Things started to change after i confronted him about him still in contact with his ex. He didnt want me to interfere with their relation as it was already past. How can i not interfere when he still in contact with her? Cut the story short, things started to change after that. He wouldnt talk as much as he used to. I started to realize that he could have just seen me as a vacation lover.

    Reply
    1. Maia Sedat Cinar at |

      Really sorry to hear about bad experiences with Turkish guy. But I think it’s also same with other guys in other country , all are depend on the person. I knew turkish man from online dating. He lives in UK for more than 35 years , and he has his own restaurant. He is divorced , has 2 boys who adult already ( 24 and 22 years old ). Only 30 days we had chatting , then he told me for visiting me in Indonesia and asked me to marry him. I said Yes! And then he came , he asked permission to my father for marrying me and the next day we were married in Islam way. Now we are still preparing the document for legal married in my country. He is very nice guy , caring , loving , romantic , religious and .. yup! little bit jealousy too 🙂 Even only 30 days I knew him via online but its like I knew him for years. Its easy for us to understand and respect each other. He brought me to visit his mom and family in Turkey too. Alhamdulillah … Ladies, not all men are bad same also like women , but u need to be careful and follow ur heart but dont be blind bcos of non sense love. Sometimes a woman will shut off her mind when her heart tell the truth. If u feel strange about a man u just knew , try to check on him. U can make ” fake account ” in social media to contact that man and see how his reaction. If he is nice and flirting with the woman in ur fake account , so just kick him out of ur life , no need explanation just leave him! We can do what a man does too 🙂 Use our logic mind dont be a fool bcos of man. Good luck with your Love! 🙂

      Reply
  6. Lisa at |

    OK so here is my story .. it’s a long one so please bare with me … I went on holiday 2 half years ago met a turkish man and started this long distance relationship.. I gave up everything straight away stopped going out with friends stop doing everything I did before I met him , but this happend without even thinking about it . I worked and lived for the times I would travel back to Turkey which was once every 3 months . He called me every morning he called me every night and text me all day everyday . I shared my life for 2 half years with him and I was satisfied and I was satisfied just loving him and working towards our future . He stopped me from using social media and controlled my life completely. I would go over to bodrum I was not allowed out alone . I was not allowed to go to the shop unless I told him . I was allowed to go to the beach for a few hours in the mornings and then he would send his friends to check on my every move . But through all this I was happy and I just understood he was jealous.. but in my heart I knew this was control. Sometimes I would disobey him and open my old facebook , but the truth was I would just open to look for him something in my heart was telling me to look . Last week I looked and I found what I was looking for a young Dutch girl had liked his picture on his friends facebook , I messaged her and from that point on my world fell apart, she had just come back from a 2 week stay in bodrum this left me heart broken she said they had been talking for 1 year . I asked him and he addmited it but said askim I love you and I have used this women for money . This ripped out your heart this man who I have loved for 2 half years is a giggalo ,male prostitute, I couldn’t belive it I’d given up everything for him all I could do was pray and ask allah to help me .. this girl carried on messaging me and messaging me it was just sending me crazy , I told her the truth and showed her the evidence she still sent him 3000 euro trying to win back love that wasn’t love and he begged me not to leave him , I asked him if he loved me he would leave the hotel go home to ankara and wait for me to come so we can talk face to face he did this I fly out in 25days not to save my relationship but to close a chapter in my life .. all I will say to you women who go abroad and meet turksih men or even you women who go down the club on a Saturday night all over the world… be careful with your heart .. be a strong women when it comes to giving your love .. if these men ask you for money don’t part with it .. you work hard for your money don’t give it away .. like he told her the car was broke his mother was ill .. iam in debt pay it off and I will get a visa to come to the Netherlands and marry you ….. he told me askim I did it for you .. I did it all for you … be careful lady’s OK protect your hearts xxxx

    Reply
    1. Lisa at |

      Little update this girl he made pregnant after liying saying he never had sex with her now he says its not his baby so now we have a child who will be brought up without a father and a women who will struggle , what sort of man did i share my life with my dreams , hes a let down to himself , i went back to visit him in antalya he tried to win me back . Iam stronger and he knows he lost me and nothing will change that , this is my story and it still stabs my heart when i think about what ive been through i will never be able to trust a man , yes hes turkish and yes like he tells me i am a play boy . Hes from ankara works on the coast in the summer he told me this is how he pays his mums bills he exploits vunrable women its so wrong i just wont you women to be careful when your abroad not just in turkey anywhere maybe you might meet your prince charming maybe you might meet your worse nightmare

      Reply
  7. Nancy at |

    I have a turkey boyfriend and just meet him in social media. He added me. His sweet. But 1 thing confusing me is that i wanted to see him on video call even a seconds but he wouldn’t. He said ihave to trust him first before i see him and he wanted to marry me and go to turkey but how can I marry him if i only see him in pictures and chat. He wants me to work there and sending me 1 consultant friend if him to process my papers but i have to pay first the $350 but i refuse to send pay for the application. He still my boyfriend and everytime we chatted he is alwys reminding me to apply. And his always to marry him. What do you thik if this. Is this a scam. He keep on saying that I should trust him and follow him always. Please advise me and im beginning to love him. Its iur 1 month anniversary today

    Reply
    1. Sinead at |

      Nancy it’s a scam and a very old one, please please please don’t send your money anywhere. I know you have feelings and we’re all only human with a heart but guard yourself. Love and marriage after one month? No proof of identity? There are millions of wonderful people in Turkey who would tell you the same thing, drop it like it’s hot. If you’d like to meet a really nice Turkish man maybe visit there and you’ll be surrounded by so many, you don’t need this nonsense online.

      Reply
    2. ali at |

      i am a young turkish man. and i can just say dat. Dont send money not just turks no one. if i had a gf from another countries
      I would never ask money from her. Especially from a lady.

      Reply
      1. Katherine at |

        I am talking to a Turkish man at the moment, he is sweet and very nice. How do I know if I can trust him? Or how do I know he is not using me?

        Reply
    3. Clo at |

      Turn the page dear you, turn the page…let him go you deserve better than that…

      Reply
    4. Caring Angel at |

      DONTTTT SEND HIM ANYTHING NO MONEY AT ALL. If he loves you, he will open up to you in camera and will notttt ask you for money. He has to prove he is not a fake and using you for money or for getting a visa to get a better life. Stand your ground

      Reply
  8. Melissa McDonald at |

    OK I’m English woman who is in Turkey now I’m actually feeling so sorry for Turkish men right now because as strong woman we have choice to make if you in there country you have to understand like any country your going to be looked at and charmed by men this goes for everywhere in world you need to know how to handle yourself and your own behavior regardless where you are yes I read full article and I’m sorry for woman who have had unhealthy experience with (men) but honestly you saying these traits are not in men from your own countries I think what I see so far I like don’t lose yourself in romance let him know from get go this is me except me I wish I had read more positive stories honestly only thing I don’t like being stared at but I have to except I’m British I look dress act talk different if someone in my home town was different I would look to out of curiosity I thing in every culture there is sleeze but you have to take time get to know people properly I struggle with bit language barrier but trying to learn as much as I can I think good/bad everywhere can’t brand all with same brush

    Reply
  9. Sara at |

    I need help! Can anyone respond to a question regarding this article?

    Reply
    1. Reynne at |

      how make sure the your Turkish boyfriend is truth

      Reply
  10. lena at |

    im dating a turkey guy for 9 months now he was suppose to get a pension in february this year but some family member falsified his passport and got away with his money.

    Is there anyway i can find out if this is true because i really love him and would love to have him in my life, i met him on fb he seems to be very honest, i would like to know how he can work for 9 months and not get paid he said something about a stamp i have no idea what he means. all our correspondence is translated as he cannot speak english. thank you any information is apeciated.

    Reply
    1. Turkishgirl at |

      he wants to tell you; He couldn’t get a visa for your county

      Reply
      1. Lena at |

        my turkish guy says he is very lonely and wants to come to live here with me and marry me, the problem is i hartly hear from him he used to contact me 4 times a day and he used to send me letters talking about him and his family i know he is divorced but i dont know why he said his wife got sick so he left her 5 years ago, he works very hard and tell me he is tired i think his friends has a lot to do with the way he changed ,he was suupose to get a pension in February 2016 he told me the brother of his mother falsefied his passport and got away with his money so he did not receive anything he also said as a business man he does not get paid for his work, i know he is verry poor and battles a lot, can i ask and trust you to help me see what is going on with this person, even if you could talk to him on my behalf i would apreciate it so much. many thanks Lena

        Reply
    2. sara at |

      lena the thing about turkish boys is that there are shy, the way for them to approach girl is by saying that they will marry u. turkish men too love foreigners girls so much. i live in turkiye

      Reply
  11. Corinne at |

    Corinne No one is more controlling than a Turkish man. They are great in the beginning but after time they change. This is how they treat American or UK wives anyway, If they are dishonest they make many promises and tell many lies. If they are honest they just get irritated very easily and think they have the right to control how you are. You need to think like them and act like them.

    Reply
    1. Sara at |

      Corinne, can I tell you what is happening with my new Turkish friend? I am not sure if I should say good-bye .

      Reply
  12. Irem at |

    Wow, I didn’t know you foreigners are interested on them this much. As a Turkish girl ,17, I can tell what real Turkish men seem and look like. First of all never trust the one you met on facebook or social media. Most of them are trying to get advantage from you. This isn’t just special for Turks. I think you shouldn’t date with anyone on social media. Are they jealous? Goddamn right they are. But in good way. I mean they become very cute when they are jealous. Secondly, they are very respectful and thoughtful. Especially if the case is about family or anyone they love. I am not sure about persistence, I think it depends on person. And a good thing about Turks is you can find any type of person you like; auburn, tawny, blonde, green eyes, blue eyes, brown eyes, tall person (average 1,77), short person and etc. Especially if you want European looking guys, search in Aegean, Marmara or Mediterranean. But if you are looking for someone who is darker you can look in Anatolia. But it doesn’t mean you cannot find whites in Anatolia. I am blonde and I am from Ankara for example and there are many whites there, anyway . I cannot say all these for all Turks. But yea generally this is how they are.

    Reply
  13. Nurul at |

    I Nurul from Malaysia. I was in love with turkish man before.I found that he was good enough for me.
    But unfortunately,something goes wrong and we separate almost 2 yrs now.
    Anyway,most of turkish men are charming;-)

    Reply
    1. Jacky at |

      Hello . I am a filipina, and a mother of two. But I’m single now and never been married. I have met a Turkish on Facebook. He actually sent request and I accept him . and starting to get know each other. So far ,so good. We are chatting for almost 4months. And now were lovers already. He opened his life status ,and same way to mine. And we do video calling as much as we can. I’m a working mom and he’s also a very busy man doing his own business. And now,I can say I truly loved him. And he also said that he loves me very much. And hopefully we will meet next year here in Phil. He will go for a 1 week vacation .and I will leave for work too . I just want to have a happy life . and meet a right guy for me. I never lose hope seeking for my perfect husband . and hopefully next year will meet the man of my life.

      Reply
      1. Yusuf at |

        Don’t date a guy from Facebook.
        If he ask money, just unfriend him, if he truly loves you, let him meet you up in Filipina or meet up somewhere…

        Oh by the way I’m a Turkish guy.

        Not all Turkish men are cheaters but on Facebook you can’t trust them fully.

        Reply
      2. Juliette at |

        Becareful with them. That’s all I can say about Turkish men. Not all are bad but generally are. The Turk love a good time and trying many different of woman before they get married. They also like hard working woman who can make money so in the end they can relays on you. Just to let you know Turkish men most of are lazy. They like to flirt more than making money. Some are a great lier and user. And they often getting bored very quickly. They loves woman. More woman they can catch the more power they will feel. I also have to warn you …the Turks are suppose to marry Muslim. That’s what family only accept.

        Reply
  14. Rachel Sara at |

    I have a long time Turkish friend for almost 13 or 14 years now. It is true that Turkish men are hardworking and very dedicated, honest and loving. But sometimes they are possessive and controlling. Also a very jealous type of man but in a nice way, for them to show that they value and care for u. My friend is a good man not like the ones described in this blog. His name is ahmet.

    Reply
  15. Anz at |

    There are a lots of topic when it comes to good looking guys especially Turkish men . Im sorry to hear about the unfortunate experiences of some women who had a bad experience with the Turk guy. But for those Turkish men who were offended for being stereo typed by some women. Please be proud of yourselves. Most women like to be involved and be loved by Turkish men because of there good looks, romantic. & yeah i agree “so possesive” Well i must admit that im happy with my Turkish bf. One of the good traits about them is that they are hardworking and driven. They care about parents &siblings. They are very funny too. We are a member of the Long distance relationship but we managed to travel every 3 months. I can say i am lucky to have him. I??U Oktay!!!

    Reply
  16. massiekur91 at |

    Hello! I am a Filipino and from Philippines. I have a Turkish boyfriend he’s Possessive 🙂 but for his Possessiveness, I found out its kinda cute 🙂 sometimes we fight because he acts like a 5year are old kid throwing tantrums. I love him to death and more than anything in this world.

    Reply
    1. Estrellita Ico at |

      Hello, I am a filipina from the Philippines..I have a relationship at present in a Turk guy. Yes, his possessive but his attitude bring me to love him very much because he showed me he really love me so much..I’m happy with him..actually he will marry me very soon! Thanks

      Reply
  17. Regis Cartwright at |

    Met this guy on Facebook, don’t know how he found me, but we have chatting since January, he seems to be really nice and caring he says lots of nice things to make me feel good. But he asked me for money and I am having thoughts about that. He says he love me and I find my self falling for him. He lives in America but is Turkish and I live in the Bahamas. He wants me to visit him.
    Please give me some advice.

    Reply
    1. Alper Kaan Boz at |

      I am a turkish man. I have read many blogs about us. DO NOT SEND ANYONE MONEY. Please, I am begging you. I am 21 years old student and as far as I can tell, it is very dangerous to chat someone new on facebook or this kind of social media. Most of the bad experiences I have read on these blogs have share the common thing -an innocent girl starts to chat on Facebook or an innocent girl meets from lower-class lowbrow and of course as a results she gets bullied, beaten etc. by this stupid, ignorant man. Yes, I have read other bad experiences that occured even if the guy was well-educated but these are so rare. Firstly, you don’t exactly understand/ know the guy you are dating as we (people of turkey) do; this is normal, beacause, you are foreigners. We know/understand/detect a person just by looking his/her appearance if he is okay or not. (his hair style, attitude and wording etc.) In most of the cases you choose stupid, lower class people.

      Yes, in most cases we can be very controlling but when it comes to violence to women, except the exceptions, it is foreign people’s failure. I mean, yes, there are bad guys out there as much as other countries have and this wrong approach toward you is their mistake but it is also your failure. Don’t blame all nation just by looking at exceptions. Anyway, my main point is;

      I BEG YOU, PLEASE DO NOT MEET PEOPLE YOU HAVE MET ONLINE -ESPECIALLY ON FACEBOOK. DO NOT EVEN THINK ABOUT COMING WITH THEM FACE TO FACE (I mean the people you met online). DO NOT DATE WITH HOTEL PERSONNEL AND NEVER DATE WITH LOWER-CLASS AND WEIRD LOWERBROW. I AM BEGGING YOU AND ALSO SERIOUS ABOUT THIS FACEBOOK THING. USE YOUR BRAIN, PLEASE.

      Of course, since you are foreingers, we do not expect you to detect a troubled person by just by looking but we feel very sorry when we see a foreign girl gets bullied on the news. And you know what we say at that point. We ask each other, “what the hell are they doing with these stupid lowbrow? It is obvious that this man is troubled, look at that weirdo.” I did not go to other countries, so I don’t know your bars, entertainment venues but in Turkey, most of the guys you see in the bars are from lower-class and sex oriented idiots. Of course, there are some exceptions.

      PLEASE NOTE THIS: MOSTLY TIME, A TYPICAL TURKISH MAN WHO HAS DECENT, PROPER LIFE DOES NOT PREFER TO GO TO BARS.
      I understand that there is no other choice left to meet a decent guy but to raise the chance about meeting a new proper guy, you should be visiting frequantly, so that you may encounter a decent, inoffensive guy who has a good carreer, good manner, romantic attitude.

      Reply
      1. Karina at |

        Alper Kaan Boz,
        Thanks so much for your candid word of caution. You mentioned that you “know/understand/detect a person just by looking his/her appearance if he is okay or not. (his hair style, attitude and wording etc.)” It would be super helpful if you could give us such pointers so we too can identify the difference. I also am curious to know how much a Turkish man living in America would still fall under these “stereotypes” or if he is able/willing to not necessarily do a dramatic change, but perhaps mold a bit to the multicultural and diverse American life?

        Reply
    2. Sinead at |

      My advice is don’t give your money, ever. Don’t be a target. It’s hard to tell the brutal truth to someone with romantic feelings, but I have no reason to type here to you other than normal human desire not to see a lady conned.

      Reply
  18. Regis Cartwright at |

    Is Scott a Turkish surname?

    Reply
    1. Berkay at |

      Certainly not.

      Source: I’m Turkish.

      Reply
    2. Barbara Mowat at |

      His name isn’t Franklin Scott is it?

      Reply
  19. Just a guy with a..... at |

    So, We the Turkish guys became big issue for all these foreign women 🙂
    Most common thing is the jealousy.
    Well, is there any male animal in this planed that is not jealous of his female partner!

    Every creature has its own nature. If you respect that nature and find the language to talk to that creature, you may have the best pleasure of your life. It is Just think it like owning a pet!

    You first have to decide, if you want a wolf or a dog?

    A dog is gonna be much easy to live, gonna be okay with every thing you do, regardless of if you are complete idiot, criminal, insane lunatic or a decent nice, balanced person etc. Dog will do what ever you want, will think that you are the best person in this planet, if you even abuse the dog! You do ot have the own the respect of a dog! Dog is gonna respect you no matter what!

    Wolf looks like a dog, % 99.99 DNA and look but complete different mind setup with different nature! Its independence, self-confidence, charm, protective instinct, intelligence and the hansom physical appearance gonna be much more tempting/seductive than a dog but it will not tolerate lack of self-confidence, imbalance etc. If you abuse him/her you will get a worst possible bite. Relation with a Wolf will require mutual respect, trust, sacrifice and knowledge about the nature of the wolf!

    So, you first have to decide, what you are and what you want, before you even make a decision about who is he and what he wants!

    jealousy is a wide-ranging expression. It may mean completely different thing to every single person, depends on their understanding!

    There is a jealousy like;
    If you go to a bar with your Turkish boyfriend and flirt with other guys in there, you are asking for trouble!
    If your ex boyfriend is keep commenting under every facebook pic. you upload and you keep answer back with lost of smile etc., you are asking for trouble!

    If you are gonna say “Ohh Honey, My friend and her boyfriend invited me for a dinner out and her boyfriend’ male friend will join us, I guess you will not come do you”!!! You ask for real trouble!

    Answer you are gonna get is” Of course honey, Just bring me my shotgun or get the F…out of here and never come back, before its too late! Or just jump down from the balcony and save me a great amount of time :))

    And there is an other type of jealousy like;

    “I don’t want you to work”! “Why”? “Because I don’t like it”
    Soon as you here that, You ran for your life, without looking back!

    “Why didn’t you called me, its been 6 hours since we last talked”!
    “Because I was busy at the office”!
    “Aren’t I important than your work”!
    Soon as you hear that, you also run for your life!

    “Honey Please don’t drink alcohol while we are with my parents”!
    “Why”?
    “Because They are Muslim and don’t like it”! (Most of Turks Muslim or not, does drink alcohol or even they don’t, they still don’t mind other to drink it around)!
    Soon as you here this, run fur your life, never come back!!!

    It goes over and over. I hope these makes a little bit sense.

    Also because some one living in Turkey, ?t does not mean they are all Turkish! Many different ethnics in Turkey too, which makes a lot of difference about the individual!!!

    Tere will be a huge different between a guy from Aegean, Black Sea, Mediterranean (Turk) regions (Who has a ethnic back ground from these regions) and a guy comes from Central Anatolia (Turk) , Southeastern (Arab or kurd), Eastern Anatolia (Arab or kurd). Difference is more than two different nations! There is a huge difference between Turkish and Kurdish traditions and cultures! Only food has similarity!

    Even the look is different! Easiest way to separate is the look!

    Eastern (Kurdish, Arab etc ethnics) gonna more look like Greek, Armenian, Arab, Persian etc.

    From Aegean, Black Sea, Mediterranean regions gonna look more French, Italian etc. Wavy or straight, light or Dark Brown, Blonde etc hair, all eye colors, taller and more athletic built etc!

    I am not racist or any thing! This is what it is! Different eating, weather, living conditions and ethnic back ground makes a lot different in the different parts of Turkey. Especially the culture and tradition variance is gonna make a lot difference about the personality!

    Try to meet Turkish guys who been and/or lived out ide of Turkey and speaks a common language that you understand. May be much more satisfying than a average Turkish citizen guy or a guy from your home country!

    Reply
    1. Wendy at |

      Oh u made me laugh do hard. U r too funny!:)

      Reply
      1. Wendy at |

        *so* hard that is!

        Reply
        1. Carrie at |

          Not really more prone prostate issues thinking that a replacement will be nicer. Do not trust Not all but many especially with foreign women they think they are all “sultans” once you get older…It’s all about them. They try to fake please you and make false promises, trust me I know. They lie and plot and are easily influenced by what they see on the internet as how cool they should be but some of them were nice people who somehow had some fantasy. Most women would think them weird, but they wished they were athletes very sad. These are personal problems that over time cannot be solved by a foreigner. It seems that non-religous Turkish women make a decision to go with the money and let their man cheat or forgive them. American woman are usually not that way however SOME fall for the BS so go with your gut! When your friend says wow this guy is so short and weird, someone you would never have gone out with (male and female) LISTEN…don’t waste your time o FALSE PROMISES. Plus if you break up with them or they with you over some fight that would be NOTHING IN USA – they will hold that against you if they are over 40 and pretend to be ” modern Turks” It’s all BS they all lie so good luck. False promises after 20 years. However once you marry them you don’t know what that means! They can be nice but most of them think they are Sultans from the Ottoman Empire. Best thing to do if you HAVE to HAVE this guy is suck up I guess and be with their program. Watch your back and even the upper echelon types are so full of BS so if you are used to faithful American men, look elsewhere unless you love control freaks….very sad and empty promises. If you lose your job you lose status and it’s a super bragging about your wife but if you look at the faces of these women they are miserable_:) for Turks here in the USA with higher eds EVEN after years…they are BS artists. They suck and even their sisters and daughters know not to marry a TURK

          Reply
    2. houda al
      houda al at |

      jaleousy is a normal thing. all guys get jaleous, but because of the cultural influences, i think, guys jaleousy rate differs.

      Reply
    3. Celena collins at |

      Your justifying obsessive behaviour, which is cultural, it does not make it correct.
      It’s also very hypocritical as the majority of Turkish men are screwing around or chasing others so perhaps this is why they are the way they are, they presume their partner may be up to the same.
      You suggest meeting Turkish men who have lived outside Turkey…. Hmmm? In my opinion they are worse, as they take all the attributes of the country they live in but still treat woman for the use off.
      They are persuasive, charming and hard workers but compulsive liars regarding relationships and money.
      You will struggle to find a Turkish man who has relocated outside Turkey and done it off his own back, it is always funded or heavily substituted financially by their partner and they are oh sooooo desperate to get married because you are the love of their life …..Right? …..wrong….your a ways to means.
      They fall in love with every woman they meet.
      The old saying fits this subject perfectly.
      You can take the man out of Turkey but you can’t take Turkey out the man.
      It’s cultural, they are brought up to use women and Turkish women accept it.
      They want the advantages of living outside Turkey and if you are bright enough to catch them screwing around and constantly chasing other women which they will deny whilst swearing on their mothers lives…. Good luck to you, he will never change.
      I had a lucky escape ?

      Reply
  20. Lynn at |

    Oh goodness… The reason I even came across your sight is because I started correspondance with a Turkish man overseas and this is describing what I am dealing with! I was so surprised that all my thoughts were summed up here! Not sure what to do… I mean we are so far but he is so blunt and I am not sure how to go about thing.

    Reply
    1. gel at |

      Same situation im in.. I met him on dating site..now im having second thoughts about him… I always caught him chatting with a lot of girls but whenever i confronted him about it he just says that he is bored and nothing serious is going on between him and the girls…

      Reply
  21. Márti Meryem Yilmaz at |

    Just laugh at these regulations. Turkey is a progressive ethos of modern, civilized Islamic country. Men and women are the same as in other countries. They are beautiful, smart, tradition and family, admirers, immediate, lovable. How do I know this? 23 months ago I live in Ankara, a Turkish man’s wife. I am Hungarian, was born Hungarian and Hungarian as I will die once. When my husband and I decided to get married, it had only one request: to move to the Muslim religion. Because I loved him and I did it for myself. When I came out 23 months ago, Ankara, immediately moved to a separate apartment, which his family is fully cleaned, washed everything. Ankara Çankaya one of the nicest districts, we moved here with my husband. My husband and his family have been adopted with great love, bestow their love to this day. A part of me kind of love is in gear as never before. My husband did not sway me, do not hinder nothing. The only thing different here than it was at home, in the dressing. I do not wear typical Muslim women’s clothes, or headscarf, only a dress that makes me comfortable, but down to the floor and covered my shoulders. However, this only Ankara must adhere to if we went on vacation to the beach, one among four, again come to the mini dress. If you can go into a major, but non-food store space and immediately offered a soft drink or tea. It was strange for me at home I was not accustomed to this. As it was strange that it was also give to another who barely have something to give, but what little he has is, will share with you. Since I live here, in no way suffered from a deficit, I am happy and balanced. I have friends, I travel a lot, and my husband’s family loves me. Overall, I can say that the best step in my life was when my husband and I fell in love and married. Are not all men and women are the same, but I have only good experienced here.

    Reply
  22. Jessie at |

    Hi there….i just started dating a Turkish man in the Caribbean. He is very sweet and attentive both in public (and with his friends) and alonem
    There is definitely a language barrier and we have had a few situtations as he misintreprets my words sometimes. My guy is Muslim which is a whole new world for me. Rarely drinks (that could be good for me as i am known to enjoy a cocktail or 5 and enjoys her bacon) I am a free spirited social Canadian butterfly. I dont wear underwear no biggie right!?? He was beside himself when he was caressing my lower back.
    Not too sure if that is a Turkish thing or Muslim thing. I sense maybe jealousy about me having guy friends. But i have heard of so called “Love Rats” So i delicately ask his plans about his future to stay or go back home to Turkey.
    Home is where his heart is.
    Definitely smitten.

    Reply
  23. Malik at |

    I don’t think you can make a general observation based on your negative experiences after all those men don’t know who you are and talking nonsense about turkish men is not your business.

    Reply
  24. Tolga Onuk at |

    I find it arrogant to say that “some turkish” men have alterior motives right in the beginning of the article. I am offended and find this article racist because not just “some turkish” men or women have ulterior motives but “some human beings” have ulterior motives. Thank you.

    Reply
  25. Muuka at |

    We are back together again. I love the man Firat Sekin. To the Moon and back. He is best thing that has ever happened to me.

    Reply
  26. Lorraine at |

    I have just met a Turkish man,I am English. He seems very respectful, up front with any questions I ask etc,seems to be the caring type and protective. Have met one other guy and he was very nice too. Decided they can’t be any worse than English men who are selfish, and most just want an extension of their mother, cook and clean etc. After reading the various comments I will however keep an open mind,I am independent and have my own mind-he may not like that!!!

    Reply
  27. Risper Jennifer at |

    I have a Turkish boyfriend i find him so protective but i still love him so much they are good guys

    Reply
  28. Ezgi at |

    I’ve met a lot of Turkish guys on the internet. And I found that most of them are horny. I’m not a Turkish, but I dated a Turkish since 5 years ago. He is a very nice guy but too protective I guess. And I’ve never found him cheating on me. I don’t know how long our relationship will last, but yeah I love him.

    Reply
  29. Chris60 at |

    Turkish men are like all men: a mix of good and bad. Some are very caring and attentive while others may be sleazy and abusive. The good men are courteous and considerate while the players tend to be pushy and persistent in notching up one more conquest. Given the potential danger of being a single woman in a country where males can harass women the men tend to be protective of their women and walk close or chaperone you to keep you safe. This seemed weird yet understandable given the way that solitary women can be targetted. Turks tend to be communal rather than independent and if they welcome you to join their group they treat you very well and ensure that you are safe.

    Reply
  30. Steph at |

    oh!! 🙁 i was affected about what iv’e read now., because i have a Turkish boyfriend we’ve only meet @ the Social Networking site and he is so far away from me I’m Asian and he is a Turkish 🙁 we have a lot of differences in life from culture to nationality .

    But we still love each other even we don’t know each others language, we don’t understand sometimes xD and also where still have a strong relationship then

    Thanks to Google Translate :3

    Reply
    1. Y?lmaz Top at |

      The things may not be the same in real life.

      Reply
  31. Emilia at |

    I currently have an online relationship with a Turkish guy. And the funny thing here is that even if its just (as of this time) an online relationship (LDR), the majority of the traits that’s been said here are all on him. 🙂

    Reply
  32. Sabela at |

    i also have a boyfriend ?but differently with yours?he treat me very well and love me.He care for me and would like spend money on me and when i need him?he never say no.But as the writer said ?very jealous and persistent.

    Reply
  33. Charlotte at |

    My current boyfriend is a Turk and is absolutely amazing. But reading articles on how Turkish men are scare me. I don’t know if he’s off doing that stuff because I live in the states and he lives there. We met through the intrax program when he came here to work. I’m so scared that he’s cheating on me with someone else now..

    Reply
    1. Adeira at |

      I dislike Turkish men soo much now because of the things I’ve been reading and my own experience with a Turkish man. She is right! Don’t get caught up in their lies. I dated a Turkish man for a bit and he was very persistent when we met. I ignored him for several days before agreeing to go on a date. The date was amazing he swooped me off my feet and made me feel like THE most special girl in the world. He would send me so many sweet text showing that he really really liked me and would profess his love for me all the time. But the more I talked and spent time with him I realized that all he really wanted from me was SEX and to take advantage of me. I’m so happy I never broke my own values for him because he was with another girl the entire time. I found this is out because I’m a detective!!! He doesn’t know that I know so Im fired up! But things between us ended because I had to go away from where we live for several months and he wanted me to not see anyone while I was away he said he was going to do the same. But I told him that that wasn’t going to happen and I saw him one more time before I left and that was it. But I am sure that when Im back in town he’ll text me right away and I can’t way to PLAY his ass….. The Turkish man I was with is a PIG!!

      Reply
      1. Erx at |

        Too many inconsistencies in ur story. Your a detective yet u can’t write properly? You found out but u never confronted him with such revelatory I information? Not even to question him in person, over phone or online? Come on…

        You sound like a 16 year old Greek or Armenian male/kid who has been brought up to hate Turks because of some wars a hundred years ago. Not buying it.

        Reply
    2. Adeira at |

      Just be aware and cautious when dealing with Turkish mennn

      Reply
  34. muuka at |

    I dated Firat Sekin. He is a good man. We broke up because it is hard for him to forgive. I miss him all the time.

    Reply
  35. Janice johnson at |

    I had turkish boyfriend. At the begining he was nice and sweet. I loved him and I thought I will have a life together with him. But I found out that he was cheating on me with many woman and he also addicted to porn.

    Reply
  36. Rochelle Wilson at |

    I encountered a Turkish man which is my child’s father. He came here to work at the American embassy here in Jamaica, dated for several months until I found out i was pregnant, i told him and that’s when everything got loose he left the country and I never see him since. His name is behçet zorlu

    Reply
    1. mario at |

      I can contact him if u want When I read your story I bcame very sad and I wanted to help uou

      Reply
    2. Jessie at |

      Did you find him?

      Reply
    3. Erx at |

      In turkey to do that to a child or women is one of the most dishonourable things you can do. In fact it infuriates me that anyone could do that to their pregnant partner & child.

      If anyone in turkey found out about that, especially the men, they would loose respect for him & tell him off big time.

      Reply
    4. Sara at |

      I hope you are okay . I am so sorry this happened to you.

      Reply
  37. Pauline at |

    Thanks for this.It really helps a lot. Well I need to research about Turkish men attitudes because my boyfriend was a Turkish.

    Reply
  38. Elia at |

    If a man jealous its kind of cute. but if a women jealous its kinda world war III just begin

    Reply
  39. Rose at |

    I totally agree with you!! However . I think they use jealousy to be controlling..

    Reply

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